Ask an Expert
"Should I trust my gut?" |
Monday, September 14, 2009 I’m having to do homebound schooling because I’m sick and can’t go back to school till I have surgery, my boyfriend is in school. We’ve been dating on and off for the last 3 years, and we’ve been back together for 2 months. He hangs out with all kinds of girls and they even go to his house to “see his sister”. I was looking on one of his ex’s myspace pages and it said she was laying down IN HIS BED!! And when she goes over there, she always takes his phone from him, and if she don’t he’s “too tired” to text. He and his sister swears that there’s nothing going on between him & his ex but something in my gut tells me otherwise what should I do??? Listen to your gut! |
"Why can't I be myself around my boyfriend?" |
Me and my boyfriend have been dating for a whole year now, but I still feel like I can’t act the way I do around my family and friends around him. What do I do? In healthy dating relationships people should feel comfortable being real. If you have dated him for a year and you don’t feel like you can be yourself around him why do you want to continue dating him? Dating should be fun, casual, non-threatening, and safe. Are you trying to act the way he wants you to act? If you are in a healthy relationship you do not have to pretend to be something you aren’t. Check out this dating strategy.
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"Does he love me?" |
Okay, so me and this guy have dated before like 9 times. We had arguments about some things and so we went our seperate ways and we said it was for good. We didn’t talk for about 3 months and we started talking again. He says he misses me and he wants me back but I can’t go back to him because my parents don’t like him for his disrespectful attitude. I don’t want to go back to him because he gets mad. Obviously he has anger issues but should I believe that he loves me? Actions speak loud than words. A key part of dating a person is observing their behavior and their character. One of the things people have to learn about relationships is that when they are unhealthy you usually know it in your gut. Lets review your observations. He is disrespectful, has anger issues and you have dated on and off 9 times. |
"Help! My boyfriend is trying to control me." |
My boyfriend asks me what I am doing, where am I at and who am I with. Is this considered control? It is a form of control for your boyfriend to want to know your every move. A healthy dating relationship is not controlling, manipulative, or jealous. It is perfectly acceptable and normal for you to participate in activities with people other than your boyfriend and to go places without your boyfriend knowing where you are, what you are doing and who you are with. Healthy dating relationships are build on trust and honesty. Take a look at this dating bill of rights and consider taking a healthy dating relationship skills class. |
"Help! My mom is driving me crazy!" |
Friday, September 4, 2009 So my mom drives me absolutely crazy sometimes. We always argue like there is no compromise. Plus I hate her fiancé. I would be so much better and a lot happier if he was gone. Why doesn’t my mom see that? You would think I would be more important to her and she would focus on me a little more because I’m her daughter. I’m a lot happier without him around. My mom is going to eventually lose me for good. Believe us when we say we understand what you mean about your mom driving you crazy. We think it’s part of the job description. BUT we really want to encourage you to slow down. There are probably times when you drive your mom crazy. The reality is sometimes you and your mom are going to disagree. Hopefully your mother has your best interest at heart even when it does not feel like it from your perspective. It is her job to protect you and take care of you throughout your teen years. Why don’t you ask your mom for a regular time for just the two of you to do something together? Even though it is very hard, try not to let your feelings toward your mom’s fiancé impact your relationship with her. You are clearly in a tough situation. There is no easy answer. You have to decide how you are going to respond – Is there anybody who could sit down with you and your mom to help you talk this through without attacking each other? |
"Do I date him again or move on?" |
So me and this guy just recently broke up, and it’s not the first time we have dated. Actually 3 times on and off for the past year, and every time he broke up with me. This past time we dated it got really serious and while I was on vacation he broke up with me and wouldn’t tell me any reason why he wanted to. I didn’t know what to do and there really wasn’t anything I could do. Now a couple weeks later he texts me and says he wants me back. But I found out when he broke up with me and dated another girl like the next day. But he still says he loves me even though he broke up with me, dated someone else, and now wants to date me again because they broke up. So I’m confused, do I date him again because I think I love him and have very strong feelings for him or do I just forget about him and try to move on? Quite frankly, he sounds like a player to us. From what you have shared, this guy has a pattern of going wherever he can get the best deal today. He clearly is not interested in being tied down in a relationship. He says he still loves you, but his actions say something else. You say you are confused, we think you are actually smart because you really know what you need to do. This is clearly not a healthy dating relationship. Check out this link for information about a healthy dating relationship. |
