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"I'm a Virgin"

Thursday, July 22, 2010

I’m a 17 yr old virgin (sp?) and usually when I tell guys that, they look at me different,.It’s kinda like they see money signs or something, and I don’t like that. Should I not tell them and just change the subject when they ask? If they really want to know the answer they’ll ask again, right?


Stand your ground!  Maybe you want to set the record straight before you go out with them like telling them if you are dating me to get sex forget it.  There’s nothing wrong with being a virgin.  One out of 4 sexually active girls has a sexually transmitted disease - which means there’s a bunch of guys running around who are also infected.  Congratulations!  You don’t have to wonder if you are one of the four girls.  We wonder if those guys who look at you different are interested in a real relationship or just sex…........

"Does He Want to Break Up with Me?"

When he says he’s working and then turns around and thinks I’m going to breakup with him a lot does that mean he want’s to breakup with me?


That’s a tough question.  Why don’t you ask him?

"Should I Break Up with Her?"

My girlfriend and I have been dating for almost 4 months now. This is by far the longest relationship I’ve experienced, but there is a problem. Home from college, we are semi-long distance. I’m busy with online summer classes along with work and trying to reconnect with friends that I left behind or went to other schools. On the other hand, she isn’t working or doing classes. The problem is that I don’t have the time to talk to her as she thinks I should be doing and it’s causing quite a bit of strife between us. There is another problem that I haven’t told her. Recently, I’ve been feeling that I really don’t want to talk to her anymore. There is nothing more to talk about, I feel. Every conversation we have starts with “How was your day?” and essentially moves on to an argument over my “lack of communication.” I’ve sought the advice of friends who say that a relationship cannot work with constant arguments as well as lack of communication (even more so if one party
  no longer WANTS to communicate). I just don’t want to end it then regret it when we get back to school. Advice?


Sounds like you have already moved on, which is okay!  You just need to tell her.  What you are saying is legit.  The whole concept of dating is that you aren’t stuck in a relationship that isn’t working.  Dating should be fun and enjoyable and you are clearly not having fun any more…..and neither is she.  Also, there is nothing wrong with taking a break in a relationship.  You might find that you really like her OR you might discover she is not the one for you.

"Why Should You Trust Him?"

So, my boyfriend is only wondering who I’m texting when I am texting someone which is rare when I’m with him. which is all the time , but then when he is on his phone he texts and when I ask he goes all crazy and will ask me if I trust him & I do . but then we went on vacation together and then I never really saw him text anyone , but then when we got back & we were laying on his bed on his laptop i saw him texting his ex girlfriend that used him for car rides , then I said to him I thought you didn’t talk to her anymore & he swears he has no idea what I’m talking about , but then later that day we were working on his truck and my friend called me & asked me what was going on & if everything was okay & I said yeah why . and she said well I heard your boyfriend has been texting [his ex] and told her he wanted to see her , but my friend that called me , always lies and doesn’t like him anyway , & is still kinda mad @ me because her boyfriend tried to cheat on her with me but I told her but she is mad @ me for it . but anyways , so I texted his ex and she said she doesn’t want him or anything , & that she never will . I don’t really know what to believe . please help me .


Healthy relationships don’t have this much drama.  Trust is core for any relationship to be good.  People who aren’t doing anything wrong don’t go crazy when you ask them questions about who they are texting.  You said you were lying on your boyfriend’s bed with him and he is texting his ex that you thought he wasn’t talking to anymore?????????  It sounds like there are a lot questionable things going on.  Don’t you think you deserve better?  Trust your gut!

"We Fight All the Time"

I have been thinking about my boyfriend and I having a baby…but here lately we have been arguing so bad…I don’t ever want to lose him..we both love each other very much and have talked about a baby before…but right now we are questioning our relationship..I’m so confused….I don’t want to lose him…if we fix our problems would it be a good idea to have a baby if we are financially able…please help….


People who love each other very much don’t argue all the time.  This should be a red flag to you.  Why are you trying so hard to make this relationship work?  A baby certainly will not help a relationship that is in trouble.  Babies create tremendous stress on a relationship.  We would encourage you to step back and examine this relationship.  When you love someone, yes there will be disagreements, but not all the time.  It is easy to be around that person.  You can trust and depend on them to do the right thing.  People are respectful and honoring of each other.  Have you thought about attending a relationship skills class to see if you can improve your relationship?  http://talktofriends.org/classes/  Think about the environment you would be bringing a baby into.  Even if things get better for a short period of time how do you know they will stay that way.  Babies are a great gift in a committed, married relationship where two people understand it isn’t all about them.

"Sex and Love"

Is it true that your emotions change after you have had sex with this person a lot of times and still don’t feel any kind of love for this guy but he says he loves you and wants to be with you? Can I learn to love and trust him? and how would I know


If you didn’t love the person before you had sex, what would make you think you would love them after sex?  Believe it or not, healthy relationships don’t center around sex.  Sex doesn’t make you fall in love.  If you really want to learn to love someone nix the sex and see if you like his personality, if you share common interests, enjoy just spending time together and whether or not he is trustworthy.  If your relationship with this guy is all physical, that’s not a real relationship.  http://talktofriends.org/blog/comments/what_a_good_relationship_is/

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